Something I hear people talk about all the time is finding ways to improve themselves. They want to eat better, drink less alcohol, exercise more, be happier, etc. But, something that is often overlooked is the influences in people’s lives. As independent as you may like to think you are, the people who are around you on a daily basis really do have a significant impact on your life. Choose wisely when you are allowing people to play a major role in your life.
For years, there were people I spent time with on a daily basis who always seemed to drag me down. Whether it was insults, random drama, or just negative energy, they were not the people I should have had influencing my decisions and my lifestyle.
Over the past few years, I have cut many of them out of my life. Some of them are people I cut off contact with because I knew they did not belong in my life. Others, just slowly drifted away from my life. There was no specific incident or anything that caused this removal from my life. We just didn’t have much in common and drifted apart.
Sadly, since I moved so far away from my hometown and haven’t been back to visit in over 2 years, I have started to lose contact with a lot of other friends that I would still love to see and talk to every day.
The craziest thing that has happened since I moved is something I didn’t expect. I have realized that certain people should have been more of a priority in my life when we didn’t live 1,500 miles apart. I believe that everything happens for a reason. I guess maybe I needed to leave to realize what was right in front of my face all along. A lot of friends that I used to see and talk to occasionally are people who now have the biggest impact on my life, from a distance. The decisions I’ve made and the life I’ve lived to this point have brought me to where I am now, and I wouldn’t change that, yet it’s easy to wonder how different life would be right now if I could go back and do the things I wish I had done knowing what I know now.
I have a very specific idea in mind of the woman I have always searched for and wanted to date… possibly even marry some day. I’ve already met her. We met years ago. She lives 1,500 miles away from me. Every day, she inspires me to become a better version of myself. Every day, seeing a picture of her, seeing her name, or even just thinking about her puts a smile on my face. Every day, I wonder if she even has a clue how much I think about her and how special she is to me. If she reads this, I wonder if she will have any idea she is the person I have in mind as I type this. Living this far apart, it’s hard to find the right way to tell her, even though I know I need to tell her.
When I look back at my old lifestyle, I remember how much fun I had, yet I cringe nearly every time. I had a blast living the way I used to live. I was also slowly killing myself and was dragging myself into a life I had no desire to live. I never thought about killing myself or wanting to die or anything like that, but I was falling deeper and deeper into a way of life that just wasn’t for me. I needed to make a change.
I had a lot of really great friends in those days, but I also surrounded myself with a lot of negative influences. The positive influences from that time in my life are the people I need to reconnect with. The people I should have made more of a priority in my life at that time are the people I need to hold close to me moving forward.
For nearly 3 years after I moved, I had no social life. I spent my free time at Disney World by myself. I have finally started to make some new friends lately. People I can hang out with on a regular basis. People who don’t live 1,500 miles away. I have been extremely picky about the people I have allowed myself to spend time with since I moved. This is my chance to really live my life MY way. I refuse to let anyone else screw that up. The people I have met recently are exactly the kind of people I need in my life right now. They are awesome people who want the best for me. I would rather have a few really awesome friends than a lot of “friends” who drag me down.
Whether it’s family, friends, co-workers, or anybody else, cut negative people out of your life. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary. You will be glad you did it in the long run. Negative influences and toxic relationships have no place in your life. You deserve better. You should demand better, and accept nothing less. When you remove negativity and drama from your life, great things will start to happen. You don’t need to force it. Take advantage of great opportunities when they come your way, and let life work out the way it’s supposed to work out. Remind yourself every day that you deserve the best. Know your worth, and surround yourself with awesomeness!!