The Way Things Were Supposed To Be
If you wait patiently long enough, life has a way of getting back on track. This journey through life is full of all kinds of crazy detours, but you eventually find your way back to where you’re supposed to be. The past two and a half years of my life have been one giant detour, but I can feel things starting to get back to normal now… slowly.
I still have a ways to go and a lot to figure out, but so much of what has been a big mystery to me for the past couple of years is now starting to feel familiar and comfortable.
When I moved to Florida, I had an idea in mind of how I wanted to live my life and how things needed to happen if I wanted to succeed. Less than three weeks later, I was involved in a bad car accident, and everything I thought I had planned out suddenly came to a halt. Since that day, very little has gone as I had planned, or as I had hoped.
Before I left my hometown to start this new chapter in my life, I dreamed for a long time about what it would be like to be able to live in my favorite place in the world. When I visited Orlando to check out the school I would be attending and to start looking for a place to live, I got a small preview of what was possible. It was everything I had been dreaming of and more. I should have known better, but I just never expected things to get so off course so suddenly. Since the day of my accident, I have felt like I’ve been trying to catch up to where I was in my life in a lot of ways before my detour began. I’m not there yet, but I’m getting closer. In the process of trying to catch up to my initial plans, I discovered who I really am as a person.
Now that Plan A is starting to reappear in my life, I am realizing, once again, that everything happens for a reason. The life I wanted to start living two and a half years ago was a life that I wasn’t ready to live yet. I had to learn a lot about life and about myself before I could live that life.
I remember before I left my hometown I told people that I couldn’t afford to fail down here. I was taking too big of a risk moving across the country to fail. While my reasoning for saying that was valid, it just wasn’t realistic. Life is FULL of failures. It would sure be great if we all succeeded in everything we did, wouldn’t it? That’s just not how life works. We all fail. We all fail often. Learning to deal with failure makes us stronger and helps us to grow. It helps us learn to succeed and truly enjoy and appreciate success. I can’t say that the time I have lived here has been a failure, but it sure hasn’t been as successful as I had hoped.
I am now at a time in my life where a lot seems to be changing quickly. While most people start a new year with a “New year, new me” mindset, I came into this year expecting things to not change a whole lot. Turns out, I was WAY off in my expectations. What is changing the most is what seems to be a second chance to follow my original plans I had when I moved down here. The only difference is that I get to fast forward a bit. I have now been done with school for over a year, and I am able to focus on the other things I planned to do with my life at the time I started school.
I am having flashbacks to when I first moved here. Everything feels new and fresh again. My lifestyle is transitioning back to what it was when I first moved here. My focus is back where it belongs. My goals are back to what they were before my detour began. To complete the “new beginning” feeling, I am moving this week. Although I will have a new home, I am only moving about five minutes away from where I currently live. Everything I have grown to love about living here will stay the same, except I will have a different apartment. This change will be nowhere near what I experienced a couple of years ago. Right now is my chance to kinda hit the reset button on a lot of distractions in my life. This is my chance to do things my way. The life I planned to live down here is finding its way back to me. I just need to let it take over the lifestyle I have been living.
I keep thinking back to the winters I spent in North Dakota feeling like I was trapped inside while the snow was piling up on the ground. Snow and wheelchairs don’t mix. I was just never going to be happy living in that kind of climate. I needed to make a change. Old habits have kept me from fully embracing all of the great things that Florida has to offer. I used to wake up excited about going to the golf course every day that I could possibly play in North Dakota. Golf season is 365 days a year in Florida. In 2017, I played one round of golf. A big reason for that was not being able to afford to play, but an even bigger reason was that I was just lazy. I was uninspired. My life was full of distractions, mostly self-inflicted. The things in my life that are falling into place right now have me more motivated than ever to live the life I planned to live when I first moved here.
I’ve always found that overcoming general laziness takes care of most problems. My newfound motivation has already started to fix a bunch of problems I dealt with in 2017. It’s a good start, but I need to do better. The hardest part of making any kind of change is just getting started. Once you’re in a routine, things become easier and feel more natural. Surrounding yourself with the right people always helps to stay on track and stay motivated, but I already got the nudge I needed to get started. I’m excited to keep working toward the life I had hoped to live here. It took me a while, but I am getting a second chance in this chapter of my life. I couldn’t possibly be more excited for it!! It’s time to introduce the person I have become to the way things were supposed to be.